Dr J's back (alright!)

I must first of all humbly offer my apologies for not having written in over a week.

Betwixt the trip back and the chaotic first week of being a surgical 'tern I have failed to keep my readers updated and neglected my blog.

So I aim to rectify this with one almighty big sum up of the past weeks events and perhaps it wont be too boring.

The trip back from Whoop Whoop was made in a good time landing me home before the stroke of midnight fell. I almost died however when a car travelling in the opposite direction doing 110kmph decided to veer into my lane at the last minute forcing me to swerve and only just missing a head on collision and a date with the orthopaedic surgeons.

The first weekend back in Sydney was a bit chaotic with housewarmings and 21sts and catching up with long lost friends (10 weeks can make you feel like you havent seen your friends in a year or so). I began to wonder whether I was just getting old... cos it really feels liek I'm no longer the 'young' uni student I once was. I'm somehow 'expected?' to be a more mature person... a more boring person? Who knows?

And so ended life as I knew it on that last Sunday night... as I kissed goodbye the vestiges of Whoop Whoop and adopted my new role as a surgical intern.

I woke early and got ready for my first day at 'big school'. I ironed my shirt with care and constructed my neck tie with a precise Windsor knot so as to make a good first impression. I arrived early and even got the updated team list ready for my reg's.

And then it began...

My first reg (who has the same name as my best friend from med school - but incidently is nothing like him) strode into the ward and conducted a Blitzkreig raid of his patients, pauing only briefly to fnd out where the next patient was.

It was fast, it was furious... it was over in 5 minutes!

I hadn't even written my name in the notes before we had moved onto the next patient and by the end of it I had no idea what was happening with any of the ward.

Then the female reg waltzed in and conducted a similar military style operation ward round before bolting to chop some people open.

So I slumped into the nearest chair and looked at my watch. It read 7:30am... and for the rest of the day I would be on myown to 'fix' the patients and organise everything from their Xrays to their trip overseas (I kid you not! I had to send one guy to Lord Howe Island!)

After the days in the Dungeon where I was gently led by my friendly registrars, it was a big shock being dumped on my own. Now it wasn't my new bosses faults. They are great doctors, but I'm just not used to doing 'real medicine' yet.

And so began a terrible week of 'teething' as I tried to figure out WHERE the Xrays were (no online radiology yet in the Zoo) and how to find the specialised Urology theatres. My pager beeped more in the first day than it had the entire 10 weeks in Whoop Whoop and by the end of the 2nd day I was becoming quickly sleep deprived.

Highlight of the week would have to be getting my first catheter into someone's bladder. The poor guy was so nervous so I didn't tell him it was my first time too and I grabbed his willy and threaded the tube into his bladder until out flowed the golden liquid into the pan. I must say I've never been more excited to see urine in my life (and by the sounds of it neither had he, cos he drained 950mLs)

One day I was asked by my reg to organise a medical consult for one of our delirious patients. The guy was pretty sick and we couldnt find anythign wrong with him so we asked cos we were pretty worried. SO I call up the reg on call and he tells me to call the other team. SO i call the other team and they ask me to call the original guy... I keep getting bounced between the two registrars so in the end I went to see my reg in theatre and ask him for help. He told me to document who I spoke to and when and then he calls their boss directly on his mobile phone to ask for a consult. Very soon after we had an angry reg calling back to give us the consult we were after... it's so unnecessary but sadly a way of life in the Zoo.

Then on Thursday at 5pm as I was about to leave I was called by peri-op to admit a patient who was having a rad cystectomy the next day. However this old guy had been worked up by the old intern and declared as 'fit for surgery' but when anaesthetics took one look at him they said "no way Jose!" But then I found out my boss had cleared his entire day to chop open this guy so if he wasn't going to go ahead my boss' entire day was ruined. So the poor tern (ie me) had to beg the anaesthetist to go ahead with the operation even though I agreed the guy prob shouldnt be operated on. The anaesthetist said "If I feel he's a bad candidate, I'll just cancel him.. I dont care!"

I left hospital at 7pm feeling like a failure for not having convinced the anaesthetist to put our patient under, and I was fearing the fury of my boss the next day.

I turned up early on Friday to make sure that I could beg for mercy form the reg before the boss found out. But as I preparred my final speech, I saw the anaesthetist sitting at the desk, looking very unhappy writing in the notes of my patient. Apparently my boss had called him and said, "I dont care, I wanna operate on this guy... just do it!" And instantly the waters parted, the heavens opened and my patient was on the table to be chopped open. (as an aside, the surgery went well and he's now in ICU recovering)

I feel like being back in the Zoo is:

a) very disorientating - I keep getting lost in the rabbit warren known as Radiology, I can't work out how to order certain tests or how to find my way to the RMO room in less than 10 minutes.

b) stressful - the nurses here are more stupid (everyone agrees), the profile of the patients is 'sicker', their relatives are more anal, the regs are more scary and you don't see the other RMOs as much

c) tiring - I'm working much longer hours and really don't think the surgical starts of 7am are suited to my body clock. Walking all aorund the Zoo is either gonna make me fit or give me premature arthritis.

d) depressing - not seeing the sun most days makes you fell like the days don't exist and you only ever see darkness when your outside. Not talking to your regs most of the day makes you feel isolated amongst the thousands of staff here.

However, on Friday afternoon, just as I was about to go home I rounded with my reg's one last time... and both of them, seperately commented on how they thought I was doing a really good job so far. It was a small compliment... but given how rough the week was, it meant more than they will ever realise. I went from hating my job to feeling worth something. I fel tlike I could face a whole other week of this based upon their small feedback. Is this normal? Or am I just losing the plot?

On another note, the love life of a intern is again, never smooth sailing. Met this really nice girl during the last few weeks and I started to think "Wow... she's pretty cool!"... we had a few long chats and she even laughed at my jokes (always a good sign!) however my shortlived liking came crashing down when I found out she had a boyfriend. Why are all the good ones not available? Sigh.

Again I reiterate the motto of my flatmates. "Girls are evil, throw rocks at them"

Fini.