"The rains came down as the floods came up..."

It's been raining here for 5 days non-stop now.

Apparently most of the roads are flooded over which in effect means we are trapped in Whoop Whoop until such time as the waters recede and allow us safe passage out of town.

Some of the other 'terns aren't too happy that they've been locked inside all weekend but seeing as I'm working 2 evenings this weekend it's been fine with me (who wants to go to the beach when it's raining anyway?)

In fact I really really luv the rain... the smell of it... the sound of it... the feel of it running over my bald head and down my nose... it's refreshing...

Rain brings cleansing and freshness to life... it washes away the old and brings life to the new.

Bring on winter!

I must say I prefer the weather in winter becasue I hate the heat and get sunburnt too easily.. but I must agree that I do get more down in winter (probably due to the lack on sunshine and a Seasonal Adjustment Disorder thingy going on) and statistically mid year is when all the interns become suicidal (or so the psych reg at the Zoo told us during orinetation)... so hopefully I'll see at least a little bit more sunshine before I bunk down mentally for winter.

Well tonight I'm working the wards and so far so good. It's been an hour and my pager is amazingly silent (I paged myself just to make sure!)... but I am also aware that now is the danger period when patients havent seen their regular arsenal of doctors for almost 2 days now and are getting ready to decompensate on me before the weekend is over.

This week I only have to work till Wednesday because then I get 2 days off to readjust my circadian rhythm for a week of the "graveyard shift"*. A whole week of seeing hardly anyone and sleeping during the day... what fun!

Last night one of the terns came home understandably upset after oone of her old ladies died on her. Even though she did everything by the book... sometimes poeple still die... we're not God... we're not able to bring people back from the dead... but it still hurts when we try our best and still come up empty... when we somehow 'feel' responsible for not 'saving' that person.

In the end I think it comes down to realising that without a doctor... many MORE people WOULD die. We need to try our best and save the ones we can... but realise our personal human limits and our own mortality.

It makes me long for that day... that day when things will be made right once more.

That day when death itself will finally be destroyed once and for all and life shall be seen in it's fullness.

I was reminded of that wonderful day last week when at church we looked at Revelation 1. There, a man appears... one who is so amazing in appearance that people fall down in terror when they see him... and he says "Fear not, I am the first and the last and the living one. I died, and behold I am alive forevermore and I have the keys of Death and Hades."

As a doctor we resuscitate people. We put bandaids on them to buy them time... but in the end they still die. It's not a question of 'if' but 'when'.

But I know a man who offers hope beyond this... one who has beaten death and destroyed it's power over our lives. He has given me a new life, that I too may rise one day and therefore no longer need to fear death in this life.

And I think that's something far better than anything this world can offer.

* Did you know that the term "graveyard shift" came about because people used to have to guard the graveyard at night from medical type people who would dig up bodies at night to do weird experiments on? How freaky is that!